Leadership Memo 2025-7
In my last newsletter, I shared the moment a CEO called an executive meeting with one item on the agenda: me. I was just a director. Not on the executive team. But apparently, I had “too much influence” and needed to be “put in a box”.
Here’s what happened next.
I hadn’t done anything wrong. I just did what felt natural: I listened to people, supported their ideas, and made decisions openly. I treated everyone with respect, no matter their job title. When problems came up, I worked with people to solve them instead of just giving orders.
The result? People brought their ideas to me. They sought my input on decisions. They felt heard and valued in our interactions.
But to an insecure leader, influence that doesn’t flow through an official hierarchy feels like a personal attack.
What happened next revealed far more about leadership than any title ever could.
I was sidelined and left out of decisions and conversations. The message was clear: fall in line or become irrelevant.
But here’s what the CEO didn’t expect: my influence didn’t fade. If anything, the difference between how we led became more obvious. While he held onto control and kept information to himself, I kept listening, collaborating, being open, and helping people lead.
The results were predictable. Morale dropped. Trust frayed. High performers started to leave. Performance dipped.
Eventually, the board took notice. The CEO came to me and apologized. He asked if we could start again. I agreed. But the pattern repeated within months. This time, the board had seen enough. The CEO was replaced.
Here’s what that experience taught me:
- Insecure leaders see influence as a threat, not a strength. They believe leadership is zero-sum. If others rise, they fall.
- Real leadership doesn’t come from a title, control, or fear. It’s built on trust, openness, and shared ownership. When people feel heard and included, they notice where those things are missing.
- Trying to control influence often has the opposite effect. The CEO’s actions showed the difference between our leadership styles better than any words could have.
- Organizations eventually see the difference. When bad leadership hurts performance, it becomes impossible to ignore.
If you’ve ever been told you have “too much influence” for your job, take it as a compliment. But be ready for pushback. When you lead authentically, it makes insecure leaders look bad. And they won’t like that.
The real question isn’t whether you should keep leading this way. You should. The question is whether your organization supports this kind of leadership or is threatened by it.
Sometimes, the most important leadership decision is whether you’re planted in a place where your leadership can truly grow and whether you’re surrounded by people who sharpen and uplift you.
If you’re in senior management, ask yourself:
- Do I welcome influence, even when it doesn’t come from me?
- Am I transparent about the “why” or just the “what”?
- Are my team’s decisions shaped with them… or handed down to them?
- Would I rather be right… or get it right?
The truth is, people won’t follow your title. They’ll follow your character.
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